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right! this happens occasionally when an artist stays with a song and manages to actually travel with it to another place. there's a part of me that takes the minor misfortunes of my life (minor because i really think i have it good and am very lucky) as an excuse to look out at the stars and decide that the world is too scary a place to put much effort in. when i first heard metal heart on moon pix i was riding on a commuter train at about 9:30 on a very dark night and somehow the unsure vocals of chan mixed with the lyric made me attach myself to the song in a possibly unhealthy way. (i've been known to use sadzoo as a screen name here and there.) now it seems to mean something else and yet the lyrics never changed (except for the unexplained removal of "hold them up to a light")... it's always been a song of chastisement of those who can't let go and be themselves because that's the easier way out. it is for me. but how selfish to believe in the meaning of all the bad dreaming. the difference between then and now is that then chan seemed to be all about self-doubt and now she's sort of like a self-doubt survivor. that recording is so solid. but yes, i love the entire album.

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